Is there a chapter in How to Win Friends and Influence People for folks who live without a social filter? Because I'm fairly certain I don't have one.
I mean, when you leave a comment on your husband's Facebook page that says "I watered the grass this morning. ;) " no one could possibly look at that as innocently stating that you watered the new sod when there's an emoticon winking at the reader. That simple semi-colon, close parenthesis smiley face, made it dirty. I knew it and I typed it anyway. Because I have no filter.
Jeez, Madison, I say the most inappropriate things to you, don't I? I'm so sorry, babe."
She replied with, "I don't mind. You can say them in front of my friends, too, you know. They think you're The Cool Mom." Well of course they do! They're teenagers! They think the word "dingleberry" is funny. *giggle* Dingleberry.
I'll give you another example of my filter-less existence. Yesterday we took Madison to the orthodontist for her initial visit. I sat filling out the forms while John read Sports Illustrated For Kids and Madison played on her iPod. Halfway through my scribbling, this happened:
"Psst. Hey, hon. The question here asks "What is the reason for your visit". I should put "Those teeth be crooked, yo."
John laughed and said, "Jacked up teeth."
"Yes! Ha ha!" said I...and wrote it down. "Jacked. Up. Teeth."
Super proud of having the nerve to put his thought to paper, I felt it was only right that I should share it with him. He looked at it and said incredulously, "You PUT that?!" Then he shook his head.
Well, duh! Yeah, I put that! It's funny.
They probably get tired of seeing the same thing every day. I wanted to make a memorable first impression. I imagined that the doctor would look at it and think Well, I don't think I've ever seen that exact answer before. And he would be correct.