Friday, March 16, 2012

Is that a penis in your yard?

When did mannequin parts become a popular choice in lawn decor?  
Penis De Milo?

I wanted to ask that very question of the people who own this house, but I was too afraid to knock on the door and ask, for fear of being thrown into a well in the basement and told to put the lotion on my skin.   

Lucky for you, gentle reader, I wasn't too afraid to drive slowly by and have my ten-year-old take a picture, hoping that no one was home to see us gawking at The Three Pelvises stationed in front of their house. If anyone had come out to ask me, I would have told them "It's for my blog!  People need to see this!" I drove away, cackling.

So you see, it was purely for your benefit that I snapped this picture; to expose you all to what I believe may be the new height of modern art.   It's clearly a collection of an abbreviated form of Michelangelo's David.

Don't give me any bull about being able to see this kind of "art" at any clothing store in the mall.   I can't even tell you the last time I saw a naked mannequin at the mall, excepting the time when I walked past a salesclerk wrestling the pants off a member of his display personnel.  I felt like I had just interrupted the filming of a horrifically disturbing rape scene in which the victim had first been dismembered, when he looked guiltily up at me.  One look seemed to say, "What happens at the mall before business hours, stays at the mall"... until it's written on my blog for all of you to read. 

Where was I headed with this?  Oh, yes.

Exposure to the arts.  You needed it, I'm providing it.  

 You're welcome.


  1. Sniggles & Gigkers... ;D

  2. I was going to tell you that your picture was fuzzy, but as I read that the 10yr old snapped the pic while you drove slowly, I can see why. I also want to know why this would be art, and why three? It's a little asymmetrical. Maybe it's like the balls hanging off of ones bumper. Hmm.

  3. Hey, if you've got the balls *cough cough* to put manly bulges on your front yard, you deserve to have people stop and gawk. LOL

  4. Even my 12 year old gave me a WTF look. I don't even know what to say about this. I am guessing they don't have an HOA.

  5. hmm... a penis you say. well guess i should get one for my yard so i can stay hip by the way this is written by kylee jakubowski aka your bff

  6. I would love a few of these to impress my lovely neighbor that screams at me if a park a inch tward his property. Iam now thinking blaring 80s rock out my bedroom window is so last year ! Kylees mom


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All others, thank you so much for your comments! ♥ Riki

Some Other Stuff I Wrote